And just like that, our baby turned 1.

Reflecting on this past year brings so many emotions. All the sleepless nights, all the emotional rollercoasters, all the poop explosions, all the breastfeeding struggles and forgetting pump pieces while pumping at work, all the tears over spilled milk, all the disagreements on how we should sleep train or introduce solids, all the moments of intense joy hearing her giggle or seeing her reach milestones, all the memories made. I am overwhelmed with joy and gratitude.

This past weekend we had one of Maddy’s birthday parties and even for the people we still have to celebrate with, we truly cannot thank you guys enough for all that you have done. A little party just to feed people as a ‘thank you’ truly is not enough. We didn’t really do much of a theme but knew that we wanted it rainbow colored because Madelyn is our rainbow baby. We ended up ordering a rainbow balloon garland from Etsy that turned out SO WELL. Shoutout to Sunmi and Grace for putting it together and shoutout to everyone who came early to help us set up that day! We kept decorations pretty simple with a few decorative string lights and flowers and hung a few pictures with some twine and mini clothes pins. We also had her doljabi ceremony, which is a Korean tradition intended to bless the child with a bright and prosperous future. Maddy was placed in front of several objects and encouraged to pick one. The object that she selects is believed to foretell her future. After much suspense, Maddy ended up picking the Apple pen which means scholar/teacher!

Once again, to all the people who came to visit us right after the delivery, to everyone in state and out of state who sent food to our home, to those who have constantly checked up on us to see if we are doing okay, thank you, thank you, THANK YOU. To those who were patient with me at my lows when I was an emotional, deliriously tired mess, to those who have celebrated in moments when I would be so proud that my daughter learned how to clap, to those who kept reminding me that I was a great mother after I vented and broke down about how horrible I felt for losing my patience and yelling at my child…thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for believing in me, for encouraging me, for rooting for our family, for loving me despite my ugly side, for extending grace when I was snippy. Thank you all for loving my daughter as your own.

This video Danny made is mainly for ourselves as a reminder of this past year and honestly a reminder of how far God has brought us and provided for us. I cried a lot watching Danny make this video because it reminds me of those really hard days when I really didn’t think I could make it one more day, to the moments where I am bubbling over with love where I can’t even remember life without this precious baby in our house. I am seriously so humbled and so grateful that we have been entrusted as parents and guardians over Madelyn. There were definitely days (weeks even) that felt very long but this year truly has flown by. Madelyn is loved beyond belief and I hope she grows to know that as much as this earthly community loves her, her heavenly Father loves her EVEN MORE so. Happy birthday, baby girl. My heart rejoices over you and I love you so much.